All right, it’s been three more weeks and I still hate the women of The O.C. Is it too early for me to start ranting about the lack of positive female role models on this show?

Let’s start with our ostensible lead, Marissa, FOX’s answer to Katie Holmes. With her melty-wax face and her wishy-washy disposition, she's an almost pitch-perfect replica of Joey Potter: She's the too-tall girl from the right side of the…er, ocean? Okay, the analogy kinda falls apart, but it doesn't change the fact that I already hate her. If we find out that she didn't sleep with Luke I may hate her a bit less, because fucking a guy you've been putting off for years just to get back at a guy you've only known a few weeks is so very lame.

And what was the big deal with that anyway? Is Ryan supposed to give a rat's ass if she slept with Luke? If he does, are we supposed to sympathize with him? (I sure as hell won't because fuck you, FOX, if you're trying to send the message that Ryan has any sort of "ownership" over her) Is there some bizarre rule in the O.C. that once you've slept with a guy, you're bound to him forever? I'm just not getting it.

Summer? Step away from the Seth, you skanky little douchebag. I'm going to assume that the reasons this girl should not be emulated by any of the impressionable teens in the audience go without saying and just move on because I can't even begin to talk about her all-smushed-in-the-center-of-her-face features or her "this dress may also be used as a tablecloth" fashion choices or the complete implausibility of a 16-year-old girl of any financial bracket caring about meeting older, rich, single guys. Seth's faces during those conversations were hysterical, though. MmmmmSeth.

Grandpa's girlfriend. Oh, ick. I suppose I should be thankful that the writers didn't go the traditional route with this storyline, which would've had her and Ryan getting caught together and Ryan Brandon Walshing at her about how she has so much more to offer than just being a virtual prostitute. Of course, by eschewing that idea, there was virtually no resolution to that entire plot except for her telling Ryan he was in love with Marissa. Good thing, too, 'cause the dent in my head from being hit with the "Ryan loves Marissa" bat in the last few episodes was almost fully healed.

Kirsten, again, I hate less than all the other women, but she still should've told Sandy to stuff it sooner. And the Daddy issues, I feel, will seem like nothing when the ominously mentioned sister shows up. (February sweeps? May?)

So, yeah...this show is still little more than a hot boy buffet-slash-template for how women of all ages should not act in any given situation. I sincerely hope that all those avatars I'm seeing at FanForum of Summer and Marissa aren't indicative of teen girls actually *gasp* looking up to them. My feminist sensibilities simply can't bear the thought.